What You're Really Hungry For - Kim Shapira, MS, RD

welcome back to another episode of

Christian Natural Health today I'm

excited to have Kim shapira with us Kim

is a celebrity dietitian nutritional

therapist and author with a Bachelor of

Science and Kinesiology from Tan

University and a masters in human

metabolism and CH and uh clinical

nutrition from Boston University Kim has

spent over 25 years helping people lose

weight and keep it off with a giant

emphasis on keeping it off both in her

private Los Angeles practice in

hospitals sport clinics add addiction

centers and universities uh when she's

not helping her clients take back their

relationship with food she is a wife and

mother of three children and three pups

Kim often appears as a guest expert for

Yahoo just Jenny Sky News Vanity Fair

pop sugar podcast and we'll be happy to

pop in and be a guest speaker for your

book clubs that's awesome yeah so yeah

welcome Kim thank you for joining us

thanks for having me yeah absolutely so

um it's the new year and a lot of our

listeners have made New Year's

resolutions on weight what do you see as

being kind of some of the underlying

reasons why a lot of the best intentions

don't make it past like month three or

sometimes week three or day three or day

three yeah something like that I think

it's we have very shortterm memories I

mean can you even remember what you ate

for lunch yesterday that's a good

question I'd have to I I can if I stop

and think about it right but we don't

stop and think about it and the truth is

is that we do everything 47% % the way

we did the day before and so we

Sleepwalk through most of our activities

and unless we're super intentional and

we take action with that intention over

and over we're repeating our history

that's fascinating so and is that just

because we're trying not to expend extra

energy by you know changing things up or

is that the psychology behind that I

don't think it's intentional that we're

not trying to expand I mean expand I

mean you're probably right it's just

easier so if we think about so yes it's

probably the science and I don't

actually know the answer to that yeah

yes that works yeah because think about

it our our whole body is trying to

survive every single moment and so our

organs are just doing their thing

without us telling it what to do and our

mind is thinking and and like really

just kind of surveying our surroundings

based on what we see smell feel hear and

are touching and it's just easier to

Sleepwalk unless we're like struck with

something new right and so every time

we're presented with food if we're

busy then we're just kind of just doing

what we did unless we're so intentional

right which is why journaling is

important okay so tell us a little bit

about how people can create that

intentionality in their lives so that we

can themselves up for Success yeah I

think like an accountability partner

right somebody who you can turn to and

say this is what I did so any sort of

partnership is great um even creating

like a text chain with a friend saying

in a very supportive loving way because

I think we automatically want to assume

something negative or feel bad about it

but coming from a place of Love is way

better and more empowering but I think

um you know creating an accountability

partner through text chains through

journaling hiring a professional to help

and assist you I think um setting timers

on phone is really important I mean I I

also tend to ignore some of my timers I

don't know yeah it's like we just get

used to them and then we ignore them so

I think changing it up often is also

important yeah but I think I honestly

think having a goal and keeping track of

how you are every single day aligned

with that goal is very important so you

know we can rewire our main our mind

almost instantly with practice yeah and

so um like I use aromatherapy a lot and

I

love just being in the practice of every

time I'm going to go onto my phone I'm

going to take a deep breath and I'm

going to use aromatherapy right like

finding ways that every time you're

about to do something you're creating a

new habit and then okay just doing it

right just practice doing it and if you

forget to do it go back to doing it

right and don't don't be

yes exactly yeah because we forget so

quickly yeah and so I've heard that it

typically takes somewhere between 21 and

90 days to create a new habit for people

depending on the person is that

typically what you find like if you

stick with something for about that long

then now I think it could be faster I do

think it could be faster yeah I

mean I I just think it like I think

Neuroscience actually says that we can

change almost instantly right uhuh and

so it's just the reminder that we're

practicing change right yeah that makes

sense yeah which is really important

yeah absolutely yeah it does it feel

confusing like how do we so like if we

talk about gratitude or being grateful

for something and then I'm going to now

practice gratitude yeah

then so the way it's so off topic but

the way you can explain this is that we

have a little bit or a limited amount of

glue in our mind for our our neurons and

neurotransmitters and when we practice a

new habit it kind of steals the glue

from the old habit and oh okay what

you're saying yeah and so it has to be

like on repeat and so I think that's why

it's really important to probably set

reminders and to have an accountability

partner to bring you right back to I was

going to practice

gratitude right and I think the

accountability partner has to be pretty

strong to remind you right yeah that

definitely makes sense well and you have

a method uh so your website Kim shapir

method um to help people to create these

new habits around food can you tell us

what that what that method looks like

yeah I want to I I think I want to give

you a little bit of background just so

you have some idea I've been a private

practice for like 27 years and so I see

lots of clients

originally you know well to lose weight

right they mostly want to come they want

to lose weight right and in originally

when I started this practice my very

first client I helped successfully um

put her on a diet and she lost 30 pounds

and I felt like a superhero right I'm

like okay now like we fixed her

cholesterol and her blood pressure and

now you're ready to go out in the world

and like survive this and then she said

to me I'm going to gain the weight

back and she knew that she knew that wow

and I you know this was my first rodeo I

was 27 years old and I like I said I

felt like a superhero and this was not

her first rodeo right and so what came

to be is that she felt that when at this

point her husband wanted to be more

intimate with her because of her weight

loss and she had a history of of abuse

and I didn't know this um going into

putting her on this diet plan yeah and

so she was using her weight as kind of a

shield yep yep and so very early on in

my practice I realized I wasn't going to

be able to help people maintain weight

loss if I didn't understand the reasons

why they were eating

absolutely yeah and so that became

actually more important than kale is

healthy sure oh of course of course

right yeah and so I had to really help

my clients understand where their mind

was so that they could get grounded and

be present in their day yeah so the

first thing before we even get into what

I call the six simple rules would be to

understanding where a person's mind is

and so one of the tools that I use with

my clients is to ask them to repeat

after me and I say where is your body

and then we say right here and then we

say where is your mind and at this point

we can actually go and find our

mind and my clients might say my my mind

is on a conversation I had last week or

it's on what I'm going to eat next

Thursday for dinner it's not right here

right and so then we repeat it where is

my body it's right here where is my mind

and we repeat it until their mind is

actually in their body right once

they're yeah and once they're actually

here in this moment their mind and body

is in the same time zone then they can

actually scan their body and figure out

what they're actually feeling and they

can't actually move forward until they

accept they are exactly where they are

yeah without judgment yeah right so so

it's a mindfulness technique I mean it's

like the idea has to be be fully present

so that you can actually tap in and get

the wisdom that's inherently there you

just have to be able to access it right

of course yeah because the the reality

as humans we all experience between

three and five emotional triggers in the

first six years of our life and when we

go through something traumatizing we

develop new emotional triggers that we

then are working on in mastering for the

rest of our life and we do Master them

and then we develop new ones right we

couldn't have predicted 911 the pandemic

right it all affected us differently but

it affected us right and so everybody

has their own triggers affecting them

and in my the way that I like to to

think about it is food is fuel it is

providing us nutrition for our bodies

and when we think food is Comfort or

entertainment or Joy or the enemy we're

usually irrational it means we've been

emotionally triggered and so if that

happens our mind kind of jumps out of

our body to help us survive this moment

and find something a little bit more

pleasurable and so if we talk about

automatic behaviors or the way we did it

yesterday if I felt stressed and I

thought food was a good idea when I feel

stressed today my mind is going to say

guess what Kim who is a great idea and

it's going to be really important for me

to know that my mind is on what I'm

stressed about and not in this moment

right and I shouldn't be eating unless I

can actually identify I'm hungry in my

stomach sure so once somebody's

recognized that like let's say now they

they feel like I'm just feeling stressed

and I crave sugar because that makes me

comforted even if you can make that

connection how do you get somebody to

address the real root issue as opposed

to reaching for the sugary treat yeah so

it's kind of like a reparenting tool

right we have to be able to to say would

I tell my children to eat when they feel

stressed right or what would I what

advice would I give my best friend if

they were telling me they were stressed

yeah right and then it's probably taking

a deep breath probably trusting that

this is going to pass and that you're

going to be okay right yeah and what our

mind needs to know at all times is that

it's safe yeah so letting your mind know

actually in this moment I'm safe I don't

like this moment and this moment is

tough

but I'm safe and then one of the things

if you're craving sugar if I say you

can't have it that makes you very unsafe

make it sure yeah so any type of

restriction is totally unsafe and so

just saying to yourself I'm stressed I'm

thinking about sugar whatever it is I'm

thinking about I'm G to put on hold I

can come back to it but I only eat when

I'm physically hungry got it not because

my chest is tight right yeah yeah so if

you put that on hold for a few minutes

you're not saying no to yourself you're

just saying going to sit with this this

discomfort and I'm gonna process the

emotion that comes up do you find that

on the other end of that a lot of people

decide not to have the sugar after all

yeah so if we get into the six simple

rules the first rule is to eat when

you're hungry okay yeah and so you know

nobody's really

hungry for a cookie true yes yeah and so

normal eating is sometimes eating a

cookie right or birthday cake or ice

cream that's normal right but most of

the time you're not hungry for that and

so there's I mean we're jumping ahead to

talk about Cravings even when you have

to understand but like why are you

craving this is this because you've

already had some today or the day before

and now you're having physical

withdrawals yeah and could you say to

your mind I'm not really hungry I know

it sounds like a good idea but I'm not

having it today and what will happen

right and generally we won't remember

that we were even thinking about that

cookie because like I said before we

can't even remember what we ate

yesterday sure yeah no that makes sense

yeah do you find that people need to

substitute a different Behavior or

activity or something when that craving

comes up I think people jump to that

conclusion that they should and I don't

want them to oh interesting okay so what

alternative do you recommend just kind

of sitting yeah and like what I what I

mean I think we're on the same page but

like let's say somebody's craving a

cookie and then they recognize they're

not hungry and then they substitute it

for an orange right so now they've

rationalized that the Orange is healthy

I see they're also not physically hungry

and so anytime you eat and you're not

hungry I would argue that it's not

healthy even though it might have

vitamin C sure absolutely yeah so if

you're saying I'm

stressed and now I want to find an

activity that's going to be better

suited for that absolutely abolutely

sure right but

substituting yeah something else that

also isn't solving the problem yeah yeah

I mean especially if you're in

discomfort in your body and your mind is

telling you there's like a shiny pretty

object outside of your mind that looks

like an orange or you know a cookie then

I would remember like remind you you

want to bring your mind back to your

body we are so you can feel the stress

and say this is okay I can deal with

this I don't like it but I have

everything I need inside of me to handle

this moment yep that makes sense over

and over so Step One is eat when you're

hungry what's yeah so it's a little bit

longer than that so it's eat when you're

hungry take your normal

portion not the portion on the label or

what the chef prepared right your normal

portion cut it in half put that other

half on hold and wait 15 minutes to see

if you need more food so there's a fail

save yeah okay yeah and a lot of people

become very fearful when I say eat

half yeah which is also it's I

understand the fear especially if you've

come from

restriction yeah but you need to be

curious to see why you're even eating it

is it because you're hungry or because

it tastes good yeah you need to figure

it out yeah yeah and if you create that

little bit of space then that gives you

the opportunity to tap in and recogn you

got it you got it exactly yeah yeah rule

number two is to eat what you love with

a caveat that you have to eat the foods

that love you

back okay only when you're hungry

starting with half y that makes sense so

and the foods that you love that also

love you back another words just are

there some things that because we're

trying not to restrict so what if

somebody super craves potato chips which

are love you

back maybe they do love them back maybe

they're not you know like I think a

dietary pattern the sum total of

everything you're eating is far more

important than having potato chips

occasionally right and so um having a

diet that's well-rounded and your body

doesn't have any inflammatory signs

means that chips are going to be like a

nonissue in your day but if you're

somebody who has headaches runny nose

clearing your throat heartburn bloating

nausea any digestive distress gas

bloating diarrhea constipation itchiness

psoriasis eczema and and joint pain

right any of these right then as I'm

clearing my throat then have the

question excuse me does the food love

you back sure that makes so you know

some people can't tolerate potatoes some

people can't tolerate the oils in the

potato chips and so it's not just the

potato chip there's so much involved

right but when somebody is also saying I

should eat that I shouldn't eat that I

can't or it's healthy or unhealthy then

we're actually dealing with a whole

bunch of emotional trauma and this rule

really teaches you to trust that food is

food and that dessert is food and that

pasta is food and a banana is food right

and if you start seeing everything as

food then you actually can move into the

direction of how does that banana make

me feel right not sensationalizing

anything right yeah that makes sense

yeah okay so what's next rule number

three is to eat without distractions oh

I like it yeah yeah and so we eat

because the food is in front of us and

we tend to do that 30% more than if it

wasn't in front of us we tend to eat

because of emotional reasons because

we're craving something and for hunger

and so I try and teach my clients just

to eat for Hunger got it yeah and so if

you're distracted then you're not able

to check in and recognize that you're

reading for the right reasons exactly

yeah and you're also probably not

satisfied that way too right definitely

not

satisfied yeah yeah saing I mean we tend

to eat three to five times a day we have

21 meals a week and you know as I keep

repeating we don't remember them but we

I know a lot of people who can't wait to

get on the couch with a bag of pretzels

and just chill out for the day yeah and

so I would urge them just to take those

pretzels to the kitchen

table and what they're going to find is

that's really

boring yeah even though they love the

pretzels and right so then why are you

actually eating it right yeah that and

it's more of an opportunity to figure

out like what is it you really

need yeah yeah yeah so rule number

four is 10,000 steps every single day

good yes absolutely

yeah exactly the average American gets

about 3,000 is that right wow okay and

the real goal is

7,000 and that decreases your risk of

almost every disease and sudden death by

50% but what I have found is that if you

get 10,000 steps this helps you maintain

your weight for the rest of your life

yeah so although we need 7,000 I really

think we need 10 yep and always shoot

higher than the lower the lowest Bottom

Rung of course right yeah yeah and if

you're somebody who really is averaging

3,000 and 10,000 feels like tremendous

then really just work on progress and

adding a little bit more every day you

don't have to be

perfect but keep adding good for you

yeah absolutely yeah and then rule

number five is eight cups of water every

single day and this is how we naturally

detox every one of our cells and organs

and I I call it the secret sauce because

if we don't drink enough water we can't

actually lose weight or keep our weight

off yes yeah yes for sure absolutely and

then the last rule is sleep seven hours

of sleep which the recommendations are

between seven and nine but the average

American gets six and a half and we

can't lose weight and keep our weight

off if we don't get sleep inverse

relationship between BMI and hours of

sleep absolutely yeah that's huge that

is absolutely huge and so that's it

that's what you need in order to

get healthy and stay healthy really set

yourself up for success that's great

yeah so and let's go back to that story

of the client where you have them

finally with their mind and their body

in the same space and they begin to scan

and say what is it that I'm feeling

right now is the idea mostly tapping

into the emotion and recognizing what's

going on or is it to say like I have

aches and pains or what do they do next

like how how do you actually guide them

through that process yeah so I think

honestly the goal would be to

accept right so if we ignore what we're

feeling we're not going to be successful

sure and so of

course I I mean I I do think it is to

know I'm feeling my chest is tight you

know I'm having joint pain or I'm

worried about the world whatever it is

that they're feeling right and then I

what I would recommend let's say that

they're stressed is to dedicate time in

their day to getting help to relieve

whatever is going on with the stress

instead of constantly ignoring it and

their mind jumping out of their body to

like have some sort of pleasurable sure

moment um but really understanding what

hunger feels like that it's not painful

that it's not scary that it is a message

that your body is giving you that it's

time to refuel just like having to pee

right right nobody wakes up in the the

morning and thinks oh my gosh I'm going

to have to pee six times today and I'm

freaking out don't know where the

toilets are and like what if I don't

make it sure right like every day we

have to pee six or seven times and none

of us worry about it and so if we start

recognizing that there's food everywhere

and that we can get food and we don't

actually need to be stressed about

undereating Y and also you know like

really trusting that process of I can

eat again without restriction and also

trusting food in general I think there's

a lot of

confusion over what to eat right and I

think it's much simpler than it needs to

be yeah that definitely makes sense

what's your opinion of like the wovi OIC

Trend I love it yeah I love it um

because I think it's a life raft for

many people I am totally terrified that

people are going to get off the

medication and not know how to sustain

it so I think that metabolic syndrome

Syndrome X is the most important Focus

for what we should be focusing on as far

as our health so metabolic syndrome is

when a person is overweight it causes

you will see a spike in their blood

sugar their blood pressure their

cholesterol and their

triglycerides and when they lose weight

all four of those problems go away which

tells us that this is a weight related

and diet related disease that we can

turn

around and so what you're finding on

these semi glues is that people are

getting off their medications they're

eradicating

diseases which are diet and nutrition

related so this is fantastic but if

they're not paying attention and they're

still confused by nutrition we have a

major problem right you're just going to

bounce right back to where you were just

like with massive weight loss in most

cases with the extreme yeah yes so I

think the focus needs to be like there

needs to be a very strong focus on

sustainability and people need to stop

focusing on fads and focus on what does

our human body need and require to be

healthy and you can't argue

with what it needs yeah yeah that

definitely makes sense so what have I

not asked you that you would like to

make sure you leave with our

audience I would say that I hope

everybody knows that it's easier than

they think and they can handle they can

do the hard

things yes absolutely very cool where

can people go who want to learn more

about you they can find me everywhere at

Kim shapira method so Pinterest LinkedIn

Tik Tok Instagram all the places and

then my website is Kim shapir method.com

and I have a book this is what you're

really hungry for that hopefully will

give people lots more insight and uh

group sessions and individual counseling

and a master class out oh very cool yeah

lots of things yeah so I will link to

your website and your book in the show

notes and thank you so much for this

this has been really encouraging I

appreciate your time great thank you for

having me so fun

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